Monday, July 11, 2005

Stacy Explains the Bullcrap

So everyone is getting mastrubatory fantasies about the excitement held within the cinematic walls of this new film "Stealth."

This film is about...ooooohhhhh...what happens when this country's most advanced jet somehow comes alive and begins to attack it's maker.

Little does the feeble minded moviegoer know, this film is simply another remake, to be lumped together with the piling steams of celluloid known as "Bewitched" and "Dukes of Hazzard."

"Stealth" is simply a retread of the 80's action series "Airwolf" which in itself was a TV ripoff of "Blue Thunder."

"Airwolf" was weighted down by the failing star of Ernest Borgnine and fueled by the boozing of Jan Michael Vincent.

Near the end of the series run, IQ-depleted network executives at NBC decided to combine two of their past inventions, have them fall in love and call it "Airwolf Loves K.I.T.T."

The pilot was filmed and scheduled for a September 1986 premiere when K.I.T.T. ran off with the DeLorean from the "Back to the Future" films.

This didn't last long because the DeLorean from "Back to the Future" bumped into "Herbie: The Love Bug" at a party and they ran off together, leaving poor Airwolf to fend for itself in syndication.

Since IQ-depleted NBC network executives didn't wish to waste what they felt was a stellar idea, they changed the leads of the show and called it "Joanie Loves Chachi."

This has been the first of many editions of "Stacy Explains the Bullcrap."

Thank you and good night.

2 comments:

  1. YUCKKK- Stealth looks appallingly bad. I do not want to see it. I do not want to hurt those who want to see it. But I will. Because it has to be done.

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  2. Let's not be overly critical of Scott Baio. He had hair to die for. Joanie, on the other hand, had some serious issues regarding her physical appearance. 'Nuff said.

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