Monday, August 14, 2006

An Open Letter to My Blog

Hello "Stacy Without An E" blog, how are you?

Please face me when I'm talking to you.

I know, I know, I KNOW! I haven't been paying you any attention lately and I'm sorry.

It couldn't be helped.

I've been bleary eyed from all the hours I've been working and Dialysis just...

Yawning in the middle of my explanation is isn't helping.

I know you're pissed and you have a right to be, ok? Just hear me out.

For the last two months everything in my life has diluted to a barely breathing grey. I'm suffocating from a lack of personal freedom from insurmountable debt. I barely speak to anyone and all the flavor of my personality has gone stale.

Yes, I'm finished.

You're right, you're absofrickinlutely right. I should have spoken to you instead holding all of this in.

You have been my savior in the past. At times, you're the only one who would listen.

Let's not fight. I'm tired and I want to go home.

I can't take you with me. You know I don't have internet access at home.

Yes, I'm one sad mo-fo.

At least you're facing me now.

Ok, I'll ask you. How have YOU been?

Lonely? What a ka-winky-dink. So have I.

I promise to try to pay you some attention each and every day, ok?

I'm telling the truth this time.

No, I won't sign documentation. That's silly.

Hey, I've got an idea. How about a makeover?

No, I don't think you're ugly. I just thought it might cheer you up. I was thinking about YOUR feelings for once.

I'm not verbally crapping on you. It's true. I know this webmaster whose speciality is fixing up blog's that need a little update.

Well, first I'd take away that depressing black background and replace it with something a little more eyecatching.

No, I don't think your background is fat. You're quite lean for your age.

I'd probably adjust the font a little and give you a creative header. Something a little more contemporary inspired by pop culture.

I can't explain right now. Just be patient, ok?

Yeah, it's good to spend some quality time with you too. Now give me a big hug.

Well a sarcastic "fuck you" to you too.

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