Friday, July 11, 2008

Stabby McStabalot

The Greek Goddess has a very unique way of describing Dialysis, which I will now paraphrase:

"The whole Dialysis procedure is a form of rape. Your body is violated by needles of various sizes and your entire system is violated by the process of removing and returning blood. It's all really barbaric."

I had never truly thought of it that way until Stabby McStabalot started hooking me up recently.

Stabby cares not for the patient's personal pain issues. He forges on even when the pain is unbearable and the English word "STOP" is exclaimed again and again and again. He ignores the pleas for mercy so he can get to his break on time.

Stabby likes to lounge. And play on the computer. And look at whatever pornographic site suits his tastes at that moment while his patient's machines continue to beep.

If I were to show you my arm right now, you would be disgusting. All three of Stabby's last sticks have resulted in near graft infections.

Lately I've exercised my rights as a patient (yes Stabby, you work for me, remember?) and grabbed whatever tech I trust and request that they put me on the machine.

Two nights ago I attempted to show Stabby what he had created and he denied ever hooking me up.

"Oh no, dat wasn't me. Somevun else did dat."

I may be a little dizzy, nauseous with a little vision blackout but I remember vividly every time someone hooks me up to these devilish machines. And every time it's more painful than it should be, it eats away at my soul. Not a lot, but enough to make me wonder how I continue to endure.

So Stabby, enjoy your porn. Your overpriced turkey sandwich. And your American Idol addiction at full volume so none of the patient's can enjoy what they're watching.

You're never touching me again.

Bastard.

2 comments:

  1. "Stabby McStabalot" is classic...perhaps it should be MissStabalot...I dunno, just sayin.

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  2. We have a "Stabby McStabalot" at our center...or rather a Stabette. Her name is Martha and she is a real b*tch, whose only two passions are attempting to sexually abuse patients (I was nearly one of her victims) and seeing how fast she can stick a patient before her fat lazy ass has to go "take care of" (or rather, abuse)another patient. I have reported this whacko and she denies everything, and gets to keep her job. It's like they think we're lying and they have to go ask the person so that they can lie through their teeth and say that we imagined it or whatnot, and still have a job. Only in America.

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